Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Earth Day Couture

HAPPY EARTH DAY!

Earth Day is not only one of my personal favorite holidays, but I honestly believe that everyone should consider everyday to be Earth Day. Whether or not you believe in Global Warming, it's important for all of us to think about our planet and do what we can to keep it clean, healthy and beautiful.

So in honor of this fabulous day, I decided I needed to get my Earth Day style on. But how does one look stylish on Earth Day aside from dressing like an earthy, hippie chick? There are so many ways my friends, so many. On my daily exploration of Forever21.com, I happened upon this wonderful, Earthy delight:
The WWF Panda Logo Tee

For only $16, my purchase of this adorable, fitted tee benefits not only my personal style, but the endangered species of the world as well. And here's why I suggest buying it from Forever rather than World Wildlife Fund directly:

1) You have to join WWF to make a purchase on their site, and I know that not everyone wants to be a member like me :)
* but if you do want to be a member, there are tons of perks! You can join here.
2) The Forever tee is fitted, WWF's fitted tee is $25 and it isn't the same large panda design as this one. Also, fitted tees are much more flattering and fun to wear outside of the gym.
3) It also comes in purple and turquoise!

And even though I am not a huge t-shirt fan, this tee would be so adorable with a pair of black skinny jeans/pants a leather jacket and some cute black heels for a night out. Also a cute business casual alternative with a black pencil skirt and a black blazer or cardigan with platform pumps...talk about office trendy.

Now, go forth and support your planet for less than $20, look hot and celebrate Earth Day! OH and if you want to know the best way to celebrate Earth Day, watch this: Disney's EARTH in theaters NOW. I am literally obsessed with this movie and I haven't seen it yet. The trailer gives me actual goosebumps. I am definitely going to cry.



Those baby elephants are going to be the death of me, I swear.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Vom-Worthy Trends: Socks with Sandals

I've never been a fan of the whole socks thing. I mean, I get it. They keep your feet from stinking up your shoes by absorbing sweat. But in all honesty, there isn't much else to them. And to me, unless I am at the gym, they will always be just that, ugly sweat absorbers.

Now sure, I can dig the whole tube sock look. It's retro and kinda fun. Yesterday, during Boston's Marathon Monday, socks were a necessary accessory to the "runners" outfits my roomies and I wore:

*Note: Marathon Monday is the one day a year where the Boston Marathon runs through Boston University's campus and hence there is no class that day. No class means that all students drink themselves into an awful oblivion while cheering the runners on. Yesterday Marathon Monday happened to fall on 420, increasing the blackout rate by at least 40%. If you don't know what 420 means, aside from the fact that it's a date in April, ask Mischa Barton. She thinks it's 420 everyday.

So yes, socks happened to be an essential accessory to the great success of my Marathon inspired outfit yesterday. But aside from that, socks are stupid. But you know what's especially stupid?? SOCKS WITH SANDALS.


This awful, disgusting excuse for a fashion trend this season makes me want to vomit through my nose. There are a number of reasons why I hate this trend, aside from the fact that it is aesthetically displeasing:

1) Sandals were created by the Romans with the intention of being worn on BARE FEET. Hence, socks with sandals is historically inaccurate.

2) Sandals are open toed, so as to expose the toes and the rest of the foot openly. Why on earth would you wear socks with a pair of sandals, hence masking the toes and defeating the purpose of an open toed piece of footwear?

3) Sandals were created for purposes of protecting one's feet in warm weather while still allowing the foot to breathe and sweat less in said warm weather. Socks with sandals not only make the foot sweat more but they allow no breathing room for the foot at all in warm weather. And if you are wearing socks with sandals in cold weather then WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU WEARING SANDALS AT ALL??? Put on some damn Ugg Boots, you asshole.

But try as we might, sandal-loving fashionistas cannot ban this heinous trend from rearing its ugly head from time to time. And let me tell you, now is apparently one of those times. In the 90's, Birkenstocks and socks were all the rage. The disgusting look ran rampant across the country via hippie chicks and dirty boys with acoustic guitars on college campuses everywhere. And now it strikes again.

Over the weekend, the ever popular Coachella rocked out in Indio, CA. A modern day Woodstock, this rock n' roll free-for-all brought about rockers, rollers, and cool kids from all across the nation. Coachella is like a stylists' promiseland. Experimental fashion statements are everywhere and the giant polo field is simply seething with style observations and findings galore. But, as I have found from my photo research from the weekend's events, there were many a fashion faux pas a brewing in that desert hippiefest as well.

So what happens when you have an awesome music festival in the middle of 90 degree weather and you add celebrity wanna-be cool kids to the mix? Chloe Sevigny happens. I have no words:




So, as can be witnessed from the crime scene photos above, Chloe had a bit of a run in with the fashion police over the weekend. She violated the NO SOCKS WITH SANDALS fashion law not once, but TWICE. Note the white and, I can barely contain myself, BLACK socks with sandals. A REPEAT VIOLATION! Because you know, it makes so much sense to wear socks with sandals when it's 90 degrees out, socks are completely necessary, right?! ::VOMITS::

Don't ask me how or why, as I have often looked to Chole Sevigny as a fashion icon, a goddess of style, if you will. But somehow, somewhere in the midst of the sweaty rock shows, the $8 beers, the filthy camping bathrooms and the boys with greasy hair...Chloe lost her fashionable dignity and gave into the trend we all love to hate. And with her one wrong move she made it onto Perez Hilton's, Just Jared's, and Go Fug Yourself's Worst Dress Lists for the week! Oh Chloe, how could you!?

At least Chloe has quite the fashion resume to back her up. Almost always on the Best Dressed List in US Weekly, People, and Star, Chloe usually knows her shit but does have a tendency to be experimental with her fashion statements. Well this experiment went a little too far, missy! So please, I beg of you, just because Chloe did it, doesn't mean you should. Who knows how many things she was under the influence of, her judgement was clearly jaded.


And for the record, in case you need a more credible source, according to Just Jared, UrbanDictionary defines socks with sandals as, "A footwear combination worn only by the fashion-challenged.” How's that for some justification? In the mean time, Chloe, I'll pray to the fashion gods to forgive you for your sins.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Project Ugly: The Thrift Store Mafia Revolution

I have a bone to pick with The Thrift Store Mafia. The Thrift Store Mafia is in fact a name I created for a select group of individuals who are quickly becoming less select and more of an obscene majority. I'm pretty sure you all know who I'm talking about.

You know, those kids with their dirty Keds on. The kids with the 80's tees that they picked up at their local Goodwill. The kids with the plastic Raybans on, the hippie band across their forehead. The kids that ride their bikes around and listen to British New Wave. The girls who like guys who look like they haven't taken a bath in a few weeks, but actually have. The one's who The Cobra Snake takes pictures of all over "hipster" concerts when they are tripping on E and snorting coke in Hollywood. This kinda kid:


Sure, four or five years ago this was a fun, social trend among kids who weren't a part of the in crowd, people who weren't afraid to be individuals, people who screamed "I'M FUCKING DIFFERENT SO LOOK AT ME, YOU ABERCROMBIE WEARING DOUCHE BAG! I HATE YOU AND SO DOES AMERICAN APPAREL!" It was an alternative movement. Wearing American Apparel and shopping at the select Urban Outfitters stores meant you were tres cool, because no one else really did it. Cooler than those "in crowd, yuppie followers" But then, all of the sudden, EVERYONE wanted to be alternative. Because suddenly it was much cooler to be a kid who DIDN'T blend in with the "in crowd".


So the, Urban Outfitters and American Apparel and thrift stores across the nation started getting more popular. And now, it's hard for me to stare out the window of the Newbury Street store I work at without seeing a legging wearing, Rayban obsessed, "hip kid" with giant headphones on screaming "I AM SO DIFFERENT and ARTSY and INDIE MUSIC SAVVY" every five minutes.

Here's my main issue: this alternative lifestyle movement is actually pretty cool, but it's NOT alternative. It's completely mainstream. It's a style that the masses have embraced. More people shop at American Apparel than shop at Abercrombie and Fitch in urban cities. So the reason I despise the Thrift Store Mafia is not because I hate what their wearing (vintage clothing is always awesome and fun to wear and almost always cheaper than department store clothes, plus retro looks are constantly shown on the runways because style loves to repeat itself). I just hate that these people think they are being SO different. FYI you D-bags...artsy kids everywhere are doing the same thing you are.

So take off the granny glasses, turn off the oversized headphones, stop judging the preppy, Gossip Girl worshippers and take a good look around...because you are not alone. You are not going against the grain, baby, you ARE the grain. Welcome to 2009.

Going back to this Cobra Snake character. Never heard anything about him until my roommate Zeny, showed me his site last night. And all I have to say is: CREEPER. This is the dude that made Cory Kennedy famous. Cory Kennedy is the epitome of a SCENE QUEEN, aka: if the Thirft Store Mafia had a leader, she would be it. Basically, The Cobra Snake (aka: Mark Hunter) is a 23 year old photographer who takes photos of her and thousands of other girls exactly like her and posts them on his site. He travels with his DJ buddy to hipster concerts all over (but mainly in the LA underground scene) and then posts the pics on his site for all the other hipsters too "OOOO" and "Ahhhh" at.




He also has The Cobra Shop, a place where he sells "unique" vintage clothing pieces that he found in his photography travels. And you can purchase these works of art for around $50 to $60 a piece, usually more. Talk about THRIFT STORE prices! Sample of what's currently on his site:

I mean, guys, these pieces are SO unique, who wouldn't want to buy them just like ALL the other cool kids are?! Doesn't it just make SO much sense to make money off of a totally alternative movement that no one really knows about? It's so anti-capitalist, it's so anti-Abercrombie, it's so anti-commercial America, it's SO not a mass marketing scheme.

Excuse me while I VOMIT everywhere. These clothes are oversized T-shirts that you can get at your local Goodwill, and this hipster douche puts them on his online store and suddenly they are $60 because he recommends them? PEOPLE WHO BUY THIS SHIT BUY IT BECAUSE THEY DON'T WANT RECOMMENDATIONS, THEY WANT TO BE DIFFERENT.

Do you see my frustration? As a self-proclaimed stylista, I just can't get into this alternative groove. Because for me, style should come naturally. This Cobra Snake, hipster revolution, is so forced, so commercialized, it's gross. Commericalized alternativeism??? WHAT?!

Bottom line: I wear hippie headbands sometimes too, but usually only when my hair is dirty. I like Rayban sunglasses just as much as the next girl. I totally dig this In N' Out tank on Cobra Shop, but I would never pay $60 for it. I never try to dress like anyone else. It's just not my style. I can definitely appreciate the hipster movement, be best friends with a New Wave rock kid, but I will never go to Urban Outfitters and buy a $30 feather for my hair and claim to be an individual. NOT happening. If I buy that $30 feather I will wear it with my mainstream DVF dress and gladly admit that feathers are so hot right now which is why I bought it. I just won't claim to be something that I am not.


So if you like the whole alternative, 80s, thrift store chic thing...more power to you. As long as you're doing YOU. But don't hate on fashion whores, preppy chicks, and gap jean wearing squares in the process. My advice: keep your style alternative to EVERYONE else's, so that you can claim your style as truly and uniquely YOURS. And if fashion doesn't come easy, it probably means your trying too hard.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Fashion Fug of the Day: Katy Perry

Now this is what I call FUGalicious.



Need I say more? Yes, I do need to say more. Because apparently some people ::cough, cough:: Katy Perry, ::cough, cough:: need some fashion sense slapped into them.

So here's a big red hand print across your face, you print legging wearing fashion abominations!

Printed leggings are disgusting. They are not flattering. They are not cute. They are not artsy. They are inappropriate always. Shame on you for even attempting to make this trend happening, this trend is so NOT happening.

I found these in the window of Zara on Newbury Street in Boston today: (pardon the glare)



Neon paint splashed white leggings. There are simply no words. Oh wait there is one word...NO. Never. Ew. Vomit. Fashion victim. Okay...so that was six words.

Bottom line: your legs are not a walking canvas for fun prints to make you look fatter than you are. It's not cool to be hipster. To be hipster you have to be hip, and you cannot be hip in print leggings. Sorry. I veto this fashion statement to the max.

And Katy Perry better watch her fugly ass, because this fashion police officer has a ticket with her pink cheetah butt cheeks ALL OVER IT.

"I kissed a fug...and I fugged it." - Go Fug Yourself

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Shopaholics Anonymous: Rue La La ROCKS

ATTENTION: SHOPPING ADDICTS EVERYWHERE. IF YOU DON'T HAVE A RELIGION...YOU DO NOW.

I have always been a styloligist. Like Scientologists, minus Tom and Katie and stress tests and strange celebrity temples, but plus awesome clothes and shoes and witty remarks.

Anyways, the Stylology God looked down on me yesterday. She looked down and said, "Marisa, your fashion prayers have been answered."

This god is actually my roommate Gabrielle. And she gave me an invitation through the gates of Fashion Heaven: aka- RUE LA LA. After visiting this site, let me tell you...if i didn't believe before, I believe now.

Rue La La is like a Neiman Marcus going out of business sale...but everyday. I'm talking close out prices on top brands, BUT EVERY SINGLE DAY. Here's the way Rue describes itself:

"Rue La La Is...

Rue La La is... an exclusive, invitation-only online destination where Members discover premier-brand, private sale Boutiques, each open for just a brief window of time. Our focus is a well-edited collection of sought-after offerings from the best brand names in the world - combined with helpful service.

Membership is free. It's also invitation-only. Members shape the community by inviting new Members - and getting a $10 Rue La La Credit when each new friend places their first order.

The discovery of something unexpected, something that imbues the day-to-day with a little magic - these are the "ooh la la moments" we long for. And you'll find them here."

So basically Rue La La is a club, a shopping club. A club where the E-board picks out the best and the brightest and puts everything on sale for unspeakably low prices for a very limited time. And it's invite only, so not just anyone can go...only those who have friends in high places can go. It's a VIP shopping experience. Everyday.

Each brand that is put on sale is called a "Boutique" and each boutique is available for 24 hours. And members can sign up to have email reminders when a sale for a certain boutique starts. You can also preview up and coming boutiques and set reminders for ones that you are most interested in.

Since you can't view the website without being a member, lemme give you a taste of what today's menu looks like:

Juicy Couture



The prices in bold are the prices you pay. And these items are not last season pieces. They are available at the Juicy website right now, full price. So, as you can imagine, the good ish sells out quick. Email reminders are highly advisable.

Other boutiques today include:

Lagos, Rich and Skinny, and Da-Nang. I personally LOVE Rich and Skinny jeans because they fit so well, plus their website is funny and totally awesome to shop on.

Up and coming boutiques inclue Valentine, Isabella Fiore, and Rock and Republic...just to name a few. So these designers and items are totally legit. I mean come on, VALENTINO people. I previewed that boutique, and BOY am I excited.

Now, looking at this amazing diamond in the ruff, it's easy to lose control. The addict inside of me wants to buy everything and anything. But that's the beauty of Rue La La, it's completely shopaholic friendly. Since you can preview items before the 24 hr period starts, you can pre-shop. Look for the things that you really need, give yourself time to think about the purchase before you go on a frenzy. The site divides things up by category: apparel, shoes, accessories. So I personally know that I DO NOT need shoes right now, so I am not even going there, I am not even going to look at the shoes in any of the boutiques because even if they are on sale for insanely low prices, I don't need them. Tame the holic inside of you, tame her.

And the great thing about all of this is that, all my readers have an invitation if they want it. Simply email me at styleyze@gmail.com and I will be more than happy to send you an invite. (besides the more invites I send, the more shopping money the site will give me!)

It's like I found the key into heaven and I'm just going to let you all in for free. Thank me later when you're rocking that new Valentino bag that you paid under $400 for.

And on that note, I only have one thing to say: I DO BELIEVE.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Songs to Shop to: Big Spender- Adrienne Bailon

"If you're a big spender, I can be your material girl, live in your material world."
- Adrienne Bailon, "Big Spender"

I am currently listening to this song on repeat.

It makes me want to buy things. 

I have a sickness.

I need a Sugar Daddy.

Or a job with an actual salary.

I would like to dedicate this post to Arbo Payton, who constantly feeds my addiction to pop music and encourages me to be as fabulous as possible at all times. Check out his blog, it's for the pop culture obsessive and it makes me smile every day: Freakshow Blur

Shopaholics Anonymous is SO necessary after the Tea Party tonite.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Fashionably M.I.A.

It's been a while.

My apologies for my two weeks of M.I.A.ness. Between three research papers, a Britney concert, and shiploads of visitors streaming through my apartment, I put the blogosphere on hold. But the good news is that I'm back. And fashion has hardly been put on hold during my absence, so I have a lot to catch up on.

But first, a few musings from my rainy Monday--
1) Rain is possibly the most fashionably un-friendly weather. It's been raining in Boston for almost a week now and I am slowly running out of rain-friendly, yet fashion forward clothing. My solution- wear rain galoshes for your commute to work/school (leopard print from Forever21, because spending more than $30 for water resistant rubber is obsurd and galoshes should be fun and silly, not boring. rain is boring enough as it is.), and carry a pair of super cute flats or sweet sandals in your bag for when you get inside, a nice reward for just having to trudge through the rain.

2) I got the new Victoria's Secret swim wear catalogue in the mail today. This made me happy and sad. It made me happy because it reminded me that summer was on its way. It made me sad because the idea of buying a swim suit when it's 40 degrees out and raining is literally disgusting. But April showers supposedly bring May flowers, hence I will envision a sandy beach when I purchase my favorite items from the catalogue:

The Lilac Embroidered Sliding Triangle Top with Low-Rise Bottoms

This is an awesome suit for two reasons: 1) It is lilac and lilac looks good on almost everyone, plus purp is totally hot this season. 2) The sliding triangle top is better than a string bikini because if you have tig ol' bittays (aka: big boobies) you can adjust the top for better support/coverage without having to resort to some full coverage granny bullshit bathing suit.

The Embroidered Strapless Bra Top Dress

This dress is definitely going to be a staple for me this summer. I LOVE IT. It comes in six different colors, though I love "perfectly pink" and "coffee bean" best. It's double lined, so even though it looks see-through it's NOT. And it had a built in bra! No strapless, uncomfortable shit to deal with. Besides, who wants to wear a bra with a sundress anyways? It's loose and sexy without being whore-ish. And it can be worn during the day for shopping and lunch with mom, to a beach bbq and bonfire, or out to a sunset dinner with your lovah. So versatile, so trendy (ie: totally goes along with the whole boho look that is all over the mags for this summa), and under $100 bucks! Just say yes.

While it's a little early to be talking about summer (I think it's best to talk about beach wear and 90 degree weather after Easter. Similar to the "no white after Labor Day" rule, "no summer talk til after Easter". It's a little sacrelig, especially since it's not even 50 degrees out yet.), I was just so excited about the new catalogue that I had to give a sneak preview.

3) The season premiere of the 5th season of The Hills aired tonight! And in my opinion, as cheesy and as mentally draining and mind numbing as that show can be...it's AMAZING. If for no other reason, the show is amazing because of the clothes. Seriously, those girls are gorgeous and stupid and dramatic (and so am I) and at the same time they deal with all their drama in STYLE. What's not to love???



If one thing besides Spencer Pratt's ugly fucking mug caught my eye tonite, it was Heidi's ski chalet beanie! Feathers are all the rage, and while I would rather slit my wrists and draw a warm bath than buy one more winter hat, her blue ski cap with white feather adornment was SO ADORABLE. Can't secure any pics of it as of right now, but I will be posting it as soon as I can get one. Definitely a hot item/idea to keep in the fashion vault for next ski season!

So, again, I apologize for my missing in absence. I promise I will be back in action, especially since Spring has officially sprung and there is SO much to talk about. In fact, in honor of spring and all its glory, I cordially invite you to a Styleyze Spring Soiree: A Tea Party for the Fashionably Forward, tomorrow April 7, 2009 here at www.styleyze.blogspot.com. Please arrive fashionably late.

PS- Happy birthday to the most stylish mom on the planet, my own Mama Martinez. Love you Mom! Thanks for teaching me everything I know about clothes, class, and cupcakes:)